Friday, November 11, 2016

40 Year Itch : A Child of the Water

Kiss : Hard Luck Woman

On November 11, 1976 Kiss released their fifth studio album, a barely thirty minute long collection of tunes called Rock and Roll Over. The most interesting track is probably the single "Hard Luck Woman", which many radio listeners likely guessed to be a Rod Stewart song. Nope! Paul Stanley wrote it and the drummer, Peter Criss, sang that bad boy all the way to US #15.

And speaking of hard luck women! I feel bad for Hillary Clinton, who showed, in a concession speech, that very human side she always kept hidden from the public. And I feel bad for my country, my daughter, my friends and myself.

  But I also feel bad for Donald Trump.

  I don't think he really wants the job. He just wanted to win the ultimate reality show, the Presidential election. And he didn't play to make friends. He played to win, even if it meant coming across as a villain. 

So what has he won?

I've written this open letter to spell it out:

Dear President Elect Donald Trump;


You just got the world's hardest job and took a pay cut to do it! We're praying for your/our success!

No more rallies! No more cheering crowds! 14 hour days in meetings and reading policy papers well into the night.  Hounded, hounded, hounded by naysayers for the next four years!

And the stress ! My God, the stress ! The stress of the next four years will age you at three times the speed of life . You'll be 74 in 2020, but feel like you're 82.

And shit is going to go wrong. Bad shit. People will die in some calamity and do you know who is going to get blamed for it? You, grandpa!  

Golf? Remember those carefree days of playing golf? Of buying golf courses and breaking then in. Or just taking a day off and spending it with the wife and kids. Maybe not Eric, but Ivanka has always worshipped you! And Barron! He thinks you're the greatest man in the world! How's it going to make him feel when he sees you ridiculed every single night on television or the internet or in some chat room?

But let's face it! You're a winner. You won the ultimate reality show game! The Presidential election. You have made history, champ.

And as a reward, for the next four years you are a public servant. A Servant to the public! You work for me, buddy. And not just for me  but for all the hotel maids, bus boys, doormen, cab drivers, sanitation workers, secretaries, bus drivers, fast food servers, and  construction workers in the US. 

This is the part where you have to let out a chuckle. I mean it's funny, isn't it?  You're this big shot billionaire and you traded a cushy retirement to become a servant.

Well, you better get it right, Bud. 

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